No, really, a little less excitement PLEASE!

As you may remember, a few months ago, Ande's work changed how he gets paid. The changes, coupled with a lack of overtime, have resulted in Ande's pay being reduced by around $250 or more each week. That doesn't sound too horrible, until you start adding it up - that's around $1000/month, or $12,000/year. YIKES!!

This morning, I was crunching the numbers on our (estimated) income for the remainder of the year. From what I can see, if we ONLY spend money on bills - NO going out to eat, NO birthday/Christmas gifts for ANYONE, NO extra ANYTHING...we'll be in the hole at the end of the year. If we had one more month's worth of income without having one more month of bills, we would be only slightly better off. Of course, that's not reality. Now, granted, I only estimated how much Ande will make over the next few months, so we may not be in as bad of shape as it looks right now. I tried to be prudent with my numbers, hopefully I went low and we'll at least break even. (Prayin' for some overtime!!)

So, I was telling Ande about it during his lunch break today, and he said, "Remember when Emily (our niece) died?" "Remember how that all worked out and it was so exciting?"

For those of you who don't know, my brother in law and his wife (the ones who visited recently with their 2 daughters) lost a daughter to premature birth in 2004. Of course, Ande and I were heartbroken for Ben & Tracy, but there was no way we were going to be able to afford to fly to California for Emily's funeral. I had let our church family know about Emily's birth so that they could pray for Ben and Tracy (as well as the rest of the family). Little did we know what God had planned.

God had laid it heavy on our pastor's family to help in any way they could, and through a series of events that I still can ONLY attribute to God's grace, we were able to attend the funeral. There are, of course, a lot more details, but hopefully you get the jist. We had a need, and God worked through our church family to provide it. It was (and still is) a very exciting thing for us to share with others.

You know, it's fitting that I share this story now...Emily would have been four years old on Thursday, September 11. I can't wait to get to meet her in heaven someday!

Anyway, Ande was reminding me of how exciting it was to watch God work through various people during that time to provide something that was so very generous and truly appreciated. Ande told me, "I'm excited to see how God works this out!" He's very much an optimist.

I, on the other hand, could use a little less excitement in my life!! I'm a worrier by nature. Even though I KNOW IN MY HEART that God will provide for us...I just can hardly stand wondering and waiting to see HOW. Not only am I a worrier, but an IMPATIENT worrier at that! It's silly and stupid.

God has blessed me with an amazing family, and I am constantly humbled by His mercy and grace. I really shouldn't want for anything more, should I? Could you all pray for me that I would be able to let go of this situation and just be a good steward of what we have? Thanks!!